to look on the bright side

A long time ago when I was younger, my dad gave my brother and I a quote on “attitude” that started something like, “10% of life is what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it.” I thought of that quote, but I'd rather not think about it, if that makes any sense. It’s one of those convicting things you know in your head, but want to forget because you know its true.

So what’s going on in my head over here in India? I was talking to the other volunteers who’ve either been here as long as I have, or have been here for the past month, and a lot of us are seeing that this organization is not what we had hoped for or expected. I think we are realizing how limited we are in terms of the amount of training and skill we actually have. So far I’ve been able to observe eye surgeries, shadow doctors, and distribute glasses…which all in all seems more to benefit only my breadth of knowledge rather than actually impacting other people. A lot of us, and for me especially, came into this trip with the mentality that we would be useful, make a difference, or experience some life-changing-God-inspired lesson to bring home. And although I’ve only been here for a week, I admit, that I am a little disappointed.

But like that quote, 90% is how I am responding to what’s happening around me right? I think my disappointment stems from placing my hope on the wrong thing such as making a difference, my desire to be relevant. And I know the staple alternative would be to turn around and say to place my hope in God. But seriously, what does that really mean? To trust that maybe it’s not my place to know the purpose of everything? To not base my worth on my ability to help? I don’t know, just throwing out those things that are much easier said than done. Anyway, I’m in the middle of figuring all that out.

On a lighter note, being in India really has been pretty fun. Let me see…
-Food is probably one of the highlights, although that green pepper I talked about the other day, SOMEHOW has found itself in every one of my dinners...
-the Indian people are beautiful, especially the ones I’ve seen at the eye camps, and I love getting to know the volunteers who come from colleges from all over the U.S and Canada.
-every time I go into some kind of vehicle here it feels like I’m literally on the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland, with the adventurous music in the background included. :D

So! *shrug, it’s only been a week, who knows what’s in store. More of an issue of trusting God than anything else. OH LIFE. The same struggles follow me wherever in the world I go, which is no real surprise. Until next time!!